Watching Channel 7 news today (the Simpsons were in a commercial), they reported on a wad of dingbats who blocked access to the San Francisco federal building to protest the passage of Bush’s resolution for action against Iraq.

Now of course I’m sure that these open-toed folks have a flurry of perfectly well thought-out reasons as to why pissing off a bunch of secretaries and other office workers who probably agree with them on the war anyway will further their cause, but I, for the life of me, cannot see it . Eventually he got a little ticked off and said roughly, “Get away from me!” I was hungrily anticipating the energetic dissenter to get a good smack upside the head (or as I call it, a “hippie hello”), but that was apparently too much for the niggardly news editors of Cannel 7 to allow, as the segment ended right there.

Now could someone please tell me what concrete purpose that woman’s behavior, and that of her great chanting unwashed bretheren, serves? As far as I can tell, all they did was take some people who were probably overwhelmingly against the war anyway, and make them wish that congress had instead passed a resolution authorizing military force against people who like to chant slogans and can’t come up with any better rhyme than something that has to do with the number “four” and “war .”

When they aired some actual interviews with the protesters, I started to honestly think they were part of some sort of cutting-edge performance art group impersonating real anti-war folks, as the whole ordeal seemed to approach parody. No, “approach parody” is too mild . They sprinted towards parody, jumped on top of it and proceded to give parody a spirited lap dance.

One middle-aged woman who looked like she hadn’t combed her hair since Jerry Garcia died had this to say, when asked why she thought there weren’t more stories about protests going on in the news, “Well, because the media is corporately owned,” she pontificated, in that snotty “52% of my clothes are made of hemp which therefore makes me morally superior to all of you warmongering neanderthals” tone of voice. She then struck a pose of righteous exasperation when she asked, “I don’t believe the American people support this war. Everyone I’ve talked to is against it!”

I see. Did you talk to this “everyone” at your International Socialist Organization direct action planning seminar or the All Men Are Rapists self defense workshop? Surely that must be a representative sample of the country!

To quote a boozed up, cynical and misanthropic individual whom I greatly admire: “Making fun of these people is like hunting dairy cows with a high-powered rifle and scope.”

last update : 22-5-2018
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