by: Mr. Mustard

So, I’m trying to think of a good, standard way of saying, “I told you so,” to the anti-war folks to keep ready for use in a couple months when Iraq is liberated with a small number of casualties and the Iraqis are dancing in the streets and burning effigies of Hussein between bouts of asking, “What took you assholes so long?”

A friend suggested, “I don’t want to say ‘I told you so,’ or to even imply that ‘I told you so,’ because ‘I told you so’ is such an obvious expression of you being told so, but .'”

It’s a bit long and unwieldy, to be sure, but you can’t deny the utility of telling them so five times in one sentence.

Paraleipsis is always fun too, as in:

“Look, I’m not interested in petty squabbles about who was right and who was wrong, so now let’s just move on and not focus on the fact that everything you’ve been saying for the last 6 months or so proved to be utter and complete bullshit.”

Then there’s the popular rhetorical question:

“So, what were you saying about how the war is all about George Bush sacrificing millions of Iraqi and US military mens’ lives so he can gain control of a few oil fields and start a new American empire? I can’t quite remember it exactly, but I do recall it was hilarious.”

And the school yard taunt; immature, but irresistable:

“Dumbass-who-wouldn’t-know-anything-about-the-war-with-Iraq-if-it-jumped-up-and-gave-him-a-lapdance says what?”

last update : 26-5-2018

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