CZ is having it’s now-annual stripper party tonight.

Mostly the same deal as it was last year… amateur strippers, maybe a pro to get things going, lots of people yelling “take it off!” and sometimes even “put it back on!” You’d be amazed how alcohol creates a sense of inhibition in people who shouldn’t be showing off their bodies. Sorta like spandex .

During the summer we bought a cool projector thingy for our new “media center” room and apparently will be using that to constantly project a stream of porn onto some white bed sheets tacked to the walls. Only problem is that for now, all they can figure out is a VHS hookup, and so the social managers have been going from room to room asking “Do you have any VHS porn?” It’s really a shame they don’t have the time to hook the thing up to the house network. There’s mountains of porn in them there hard drives.

Being the selfless type, I always volunteer to work security, which mainly means I stand at one of the doors leading to people’s rooms to make sure no druken, lust-filled revelers wander through there and start harrassing people who don’t feel like participating in the debauchery. The hired “professional” security that we’re required to have usually consists of a few lazy guys who happen, by trick of diet or genetics, to weigh over 200 pounds, and thus are sufficient to constitute paid security personnel. I’m pretty sure that’s about the only requirment for these companies . As such, most of the actual security is handled by house members standing at the doors leading to the residential hallways and politely informing people that they have to stay in the designated party areas.

You’d be surprised how often such politeness doesn’t go over too well with drunk party goers.

Last time I did this I calmly told a guy about 5 inches taller and 75 pounds heavier than myself that he couldn’t come through the door I was standing at. He then made sure to let me know that he would “break [my] fuckin’ face” if he felt so inclined. Being the peace maker that I am, I calmly told him it wasn’t anything personal and that it was my job to stand there and keep anyone who didn’t actually live at CZ from coming through. At that point I recall him slurring something that had to do with me “best be steppin’ off” or some such and then he wandered away .

Anyway, I’ll be doing the same thing tonight so hopefully I won’t have to be gettin’ my whupass groove on with any o’ them punk ass be-otches.

last update : 23-5-2018

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